Worship, Calling and Kangaroos

Hey all! I'm so sorry that it's been so long since I've updated. Our schedule is insane, and there always is someone to talk to around here, so it's hard to get away to sit down and write. I love letting you all know what's going on, though, so I made sure I had time today :).

Hmmm, so in the last 2 1/2 weeks (wow, it's been a while), we've done tons. The rest of Steve's teaching on the Father Heart of God was amazing. On Friday, we had a ministry time where we could speak out to everyone else anything that we needed to confess, or just anything that God was showing you in your life that needed to change. We then were prayed for and ministered to for a while - I talked to Pat, this great lady on base who is SO wise, and another woman named Josie, who is actually a friend of Dave Miesner's. Anyways, they prayed over me and gave me lots of good stuff to think about, and I think I've finally let go of a lot of my old ways of thinking that weren't good for me. Most of all, that I have lived so much under other people's expectations, and haven't really been myself. I've now learned to let other people help me, to ask for prayer, and to let other people see who I really am. I used to be so good at hiding how I really felt, because I thought people expected me to be a certain way, and God has totally taken that away. So, that was really good!

That weekend, we had a retreat for the whole base - it was really fun! We had some great teaching and worship, and most of all just had fun being with other people we don't always see. It's such an amazing community here, it's what my heart has always known is possible, but I've never experienced anything like this before!!! It's so cool to see everyone working together, and that we're all here for the same purpose. I love it!!! So, the retreat was good, lots of good fellowship - and food, of course. I also learned how to play cricket, so it was a very productive weekend :).

The next week, we spoke about Worship, and it was absolutely amazing! The speaker, Rob, is an excellent musician, but focused very little on the music part of worship. He encouraged us to discover how HUGE and awesome God really is - we watched a movie about the sheer enormity of the universe, and we also went out and took pictures of nature, just to appreciate all that God has given us, and how much bigger he is than anything we could imagine. He simplified worship so much - that it's just apprecitating who God is, being in awe of the fact that he CHOOSES to have a relationship with ME! A lot of that hit me, and I spent the week just completely in awe of everything around me. Just to imagine that there is so much of God that we don't know about, but he's revealed to us the most important part - his love. It was an incredible week, I feel like I learned to much, and saw so many things in different ways than I ever have. It was sweet!!!

That Friday, we also had a really cool experience in outreach. We went to this ethnic market area, and were supposed to be doing random acts of kindness around the place, to be a witness in practical ways. My group, though, actually got into a long discussion with a 20ish guy about God and his beliefs. He was catholic, but didn't seem to really know what to believe, and asked a ton of questions. It was so cool that God used us in that way when we weren't even looking for it. It also got rid of so many of my fears of that kind of evangelism. He was so open to listening, and it was just so easy! It was definitely a divine appointment, and so cool!

Then, this last week, Pablo was our speaker, and he spoke about our identity, dreams, and callings. It was a crazy week, but so good. Pablo is just such an incredible guy, and the fact that we know him and can see the fruit of what he was talking about in his own life is so cool! We first talked about our identity, and how that can get stolen by the people around us, their expectations of us, and by experiences that have hurt us. We can so easily put up walls around our true selves to avoid getting hurt. God had already been talking to me about that, so it was really cool. We also talked about the things that would be hard to give up, but we have to in order to truly follow God. Again, I felt like God had already brought me to that place of complete surrender, but that day we had a physical representation of that by nailing all of those things to a cross, so that was really cool. It was really emotional - seeing all that God may ask me to give up - but I know that anything I lose will be replaced by something SO much better, I never want to go back to the place of holding on for dear life to all the stupid earthly things. That was Thursday, and that night we also talked about our passions - that God puts things in our hearts that speak to us about what our destiny and calling are. Mine definitely is working with people with handicaps, and those who have a harder time in life. I'm also realizing that I really do have a passion to dance, though for some reason never thought I'd use it. We each spoke out what passions God had given us, and Pablo affirmed those in us. it was a sweet night! anyway, Friday, we had a time of worship and prayer. The staff had prayed for each of us for a word, and a new "name" that we would be anointed as - a reminder of the things God was calling us to. Pablo prayed for me, and gave me the name "Waterfall", that I would be a cleansing force to other people, a source of electricity and power. That was cool. Pablo also had a word that I would teach girls to dance, and be able to show them their worth through that. Girls who are hurt or trapped, and I can only assume kids with disabilities. He had prayed something similar over me before, that I will help young girls see their true worth. God then kinda reminded me of times when I had just felt an overwhelming love for my 7th grade girls - I so want them to see their beauty. I think that's going to be my ministry - to show girls who don't believe it that they are beautiful! Right when Pablo finished praying for me, I just felt this release to study dance further - I think as my Major in school. I still don't know what life holds for me next year, but I think this may be part of it. This is still a huge area of prayer, and I don't know the hows or whens, but I feel like God has given this to me, and I am to pursue it. It's funny - I came here absolutely sure that dance is not my ministry, and that I could never be a teacher. God truly gives you the strength to do the things that you never thought you could!!! I'm so excited to see what else God has for me in this area!!!!!

Sooooooo, this is really long, but I think I'm about at the end. It's so hard to explain everything that God is doing in my heart, and how he's changing me, but hopefully this gives you a little taste. And I am definitely different! God has given me so much joy and freedom. And I think I get louder every week. I never saw how outgoing I really am, until people on my team told me I'm the loudest one here, and I realize that I can't get enough of other people. Like I said, I love the community, and am really thriving here!

Thanks for your continued prayers, I know they are being answered! You are all such a blessing to me, I am so grateful to have such great support from home. Know that as I minister to people, you are a huge part of it! I couldn't do it without you!

I love you all, and miss you!

Caitlin

caitlin.wiese@gmail.com